23 Most Memorable Friends with Benefits Movie Quotes: When Friendship Takes a Turn for Love

I know that saying a romantic comedy inspires you is a cliche, but I simply have to! Friends With Benefits might not be the best of cinematography, and it might be a simple chick-flick, but it has some real zingers!

So Friends With Benefits movie quotes always make me smile. The film is full not only of funny quotes but also insightful ones. Tommy, played by Woody Harrelson, is arguably the character with the best lines, which is why I’m opening this Friends With Benefits movie quotes article with his most memorable quotes.

Of course, Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake also had some shining moments in the film, but nothing can surpass the wisdom that Emma Stone’s character Kayla had to share. So let’s dive in and see if these quotes can make you laugh today!

23 Best and Most Memorable Friends With Benefits Movie Quotes

The Very Best Friends With Benefits Movie Quotes From Our Favorite Relationship Virtuoso

#1. “But the offers keep rolling in, naturally. Look at me! And hey, I love women. They’re beautiful, majestic, mysterious, mesmerizing creatures. Smart, empathetic, far superior to men in every way. And if I had a choice, I would be with women to my dying day. But me likes cock, so I’m strickily-dickily.” — Tommy

#2. “A work ethic. I love it! That is why this country is still number one. Well, behind Germany and France and Belgium and Japan and China. Thank God for Bangladesh!” — Tommy

#3. “Tommy: The babies you two are gonna have. Those things are gonna get really big and then really small.

Jamie: We’re not together.

Tommy: That was a highly inappropriate series of comments, and I apologize.” — Tommy (to Jamie)

#4. “I live in New Jersey. And I ain’t taking no ferry. Unless it’s out to dinner and a show. Bam!” — Tommy

#5. “You wanna be happy? Find someone you like and never let them go.” — Tommy

#6. “It’s not who you want to spend Friday night with. It’s who you want to spend all day Saturday with.” — Tommy

#7. “One day, you’ll meet someone, and it’ll literally take your breath away. Like you can’t breathe. Like no oxygen to the lungs. Like a fish.” — Tommy

The Pearls of Wisdom From Jamie and Dylan

#8. “You can’t deny that going to Hogwarts wouldn’t be life-changing.” — Dylan

#9. “Why do relationships always start off so fun and then turn into suck-a-bag-of-dicks?” — Dylan

#10. “I’m just going to work and f*ck. Like George Clooney.” — Dylan

#11. “Dylan: Why do women think the only way to get a man to do what they want is to manipulate them?

Jamie: History. Personal experience. Romantic comedies.” — Jamie and Dylan

#12. “Dylan: Shaun White seems really great. Nice dude. How do you know him again?

Jamie: I took his virginity.

Dylan: Oh! So you’ve guys known each other for a while?

Jamie: No! It’s like eight months ago.

Dylan: Wow! So does the carpet match the drapes?

Jamie: Uh, it’s a hardwood floor, if you know what I mean.

Dylan: My God! Terrible visual.

Jamie: Totally kidding, by the way. He’s just an old friend of mine.

Dylan: You guys use the same leave-in conditioner? His hair had nice body.” — Jamie and Dylan

#13. “Jamie: Why don’t they ever make a movie about what happens after the big kiss?

Dylan: They do. It’s called porn.” — Jamie and Dylan

#14. “Jamie: No emotions, just sex.

Dylan: I guess we should just start.

Jamie: Bedroom!

Dylan: What’s wrong with the couch?

Jamie: The bedroom has better light, and since we’re just friends, I don’t have to be insecure about my body.

Dylan: Come on, you’re beautiful; you have nothing to…

Jamie: No, no, no, no, no! That sounds emotionally supportive! Lock that down!

Dylan: Your ass is a little bony.

Jamie: Much better.” — Jamie and Dylan

#15. “Look, I can live without ever having sex with you again. It’ll be really hard. Hey, I want my best friend back. Because I’m in love with her.” — Dylan (to Jamie)

Jamie’s Words to Live By

#16. “I’ve got to stop buying into this Hollywood cliche of true love. Shut up, Katherine Heigl, you stupid liar!” — Jamie

#17. “God, I wish my life was a movie sometimes, you know? I would never have to worry about my hair or having to go to the bathroom, and then, when I’m at my lowest point, some guy would chase me down the street, pour his heart out, and then we’d kiss. Happily ever after!” — Jamie

#18. “I’m just going to shut myself down emotionally. Like George Clooney.” — Jamie

#19. “Jamie: You’re emotionally unavailable?

Dylan: Oh, yeah.

Jamie: I’m emotionally damaged! A perfect match!” — Jamie and Dylan

The Blast From the Past With Just a Smidge of Emma Stone

#20. “Jamie: You and I should stay friends.

Parker: Really?

Jamie: No, go fu*k yourself!” — Jamie (to her ex, Parker)

#21. “Jamie: Let me just ask you a quick question? And just know that I am not at all crushed by this break-up. So be honest. Why?

Quincy: Is this a trick?

Jamie: No. Just pure anthropological research.

Quincy: Okay. You want someone to sweep you off your feet, but you’re more interested in getting swept off your feet than the someone who’s doing the sweeping. You seem like you got it totally together, but you’re actually really emotionally damaged. Also, you have like really big eyes. And that freaks me out sometimes.

Jamie: Thank you. That’s enough.” — Jamie

#22. “Here’s an idea. Next time, instead of being late, just sh*t on my face. Cause that’s kind of the same thing as missing ‘Your Body is a Wonderland.’” — Kayla

#23. “Dylan: I was tied up at work. I’m sorry.

Kayla: Maybe you should care a little bit less about work and a little more about the girl you’re dating? Cause last time I checked, work doesn’t reassure you that liking a finger up your ass doesn’t make you gay!

Dylan: I never said, go up! Okay? I just said, lightly around. It’s like a, like a little button. You know what? Not your issue anymore.” — Kayla and Dylan

To Conclude

I hope these Friends With Benefits movie quotes made you laugh at least a little bit. What’s more, I also hope that you were able to find some inspiration and wisdom in them. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, I wholeheartedly recommend it. It’s not just another rom-com, and, as you can see by these quotes, it’s definitely worth your time.

image source: flickr.com