When you start a relationship with someone, it’s important that you get to know them. You may think that this is not necessary, especially if you knew them as friends before you took the next step, but the truth is that a relationship requires deeper knowledge of someone.
You need to know things about the person you are in a relationship with – whether these are small things like their favorite color or bigger things like their deepest fears. If you’re not sure how to get to know them better, keep reading.
Look at their social media
We all know that social media is a glamorized version of our lives, and we only post the good parts. So, what you see on your partner’s social media likely isn’t the whole picture.
That being said, it can still offer you valuable information, especially when it comes to your partner’s likes and dislikes. This is something you can do even before you enter a relationship with them, as it might give you an idea of whether you will work together well as a team.
If you’re struggling to find their social media profiles, a website like Instant Checkmate can be a big help.
Meet their loved ones
People don’t exist in isolation. We are all affected by those around us. So, if you truly want to get to know your partner better, you should spend time hanging out with the people they care about.
Depending on how fast your relationship is moving, it might be too soon to meet their family, but you can at least meet their friends. This way, you will see how their friends influence them, meaning you will gain another level of understanding.
Have deeper conversations
Most relationships start off pretty lighthearted. After all, you don’t necessarily want to tell someone your secrets before you get to know them really well. You and your partner will likely be in the small-talk phase of your relationship when you enter it.
But if you want your relationship to grow and evolve, you need to eventually start talking about difficult topics, because those are the things that help you really get to know someone.
You may find that you’re not sure how to approach these serious conversations, so start by asking some of these questions.
At the beginning of a relationship, people are often on their best behavior. This means that if your partner has bad habits, they may try to hide them from you.
However, by paying close attention to their actions and reactions, you may be able to see the true them. For example, if they often get irritated with waiters or service providers, it may be a sign that they have a short temper.
If they always change the subject when you ask them about something, they may feel uncomfortable talking about it, or they may be hiding something from you. You shouldn’t jump to conclusions, but it is a good idea to pay attention to these things. You can always bring it up once you have been in the relationship for a while.
Do activities together
While conversations do play a huge role in getting to know someone, we bet you don’t want to spend hours talking to someone every single day.
Doing activities will also help you get to know your partner better, but in a different way than conversations do. Where conversations give you insight into their mind, activities will help you see how they react.
Are they competitive? What kinds of movies do they enjoy? Are they sporty or not? All of these answers can be found by doing various activities together. If money is tight, don’t stress. There are still plenty of ways that you can have fun on a budget.
Be there for the good and the bad
People often refer to the beginning of a relationship as the honeymoon phase. This is quite accurate because it’s a time where everything seems to be good.
But that doesn’t mean everything actually is good. When a relationship is still new, people tend to avoid each other when things go bad. This is understandable – your partner may not want you to see them when they are sick, or if they’ve had a bad day.
However, if you truly want to get to know someone, you need to be there for all of it – the good and the bad. You can only truly understand someone if you’ve seen them at their lowest.
Listen to them
It’s one thing to ask someone questions, but it’s something else entirely to actually listen to what they have to say.
When someone is opening up to you about something personal, the least you can do is listen to what they are saying. While you may not have any advice to offer them, your support will likely mean the world to them.
By paying close attention to what they are saying, you may also pick up on how they feel about other things, even if they don’t directly say it. For help on becoming a better listener, click here.
Ask them about their childhood
As adults, people don’t often realize just how much their childhood affects them. It was long ago, so it’s in the past and won’t affect you anymore, right? Unfortunately, that’s not the case.
People’s childhoods will always affect who they are. What happens in your childhood will determine how you react towards certain things, and it will shape your view on many things. Therefore, to get to know your partner better, talk to them about their younger years.
Getting to know each other is a vitally important aspect of any relationship, especially in the beginning. After all, this is likely how you will be able to tell if you and your partner are compatible.
While you will constantly get to know someone better the longer you know them, there are still a few things you can do right at the beginning to help you get to know them. Keep in mind that this shouldn’t be one-sided; if they let you in, you must let them in too.