Even the best of us feel stuck at some point. Whether it’s a toxic relationship or an overall mental exhaustion, the momentum of your life gets quickly tossed out. The stagnation is so overwhelming that you feel like you don’t want to live anymore.
At such a point, most people keep hoping for an external change to bring the momentum back. However, change comes from within, not from external factors. In short, being stuck is an inner feeling. You will get unstuck only if you choose to take the necessary steps.
I Don’t Want to Live Anymore: 11 Ways to Get Unstuck
1. Forget Your Past Failures
We all have made mistakes or someone close has hurt us at some point in our lives. However, thinking about your unfortunate past will only instigate the feeling of bitterness and sadness. It doesn’t matter what happened in the past, what you learn from those experiences is probably more important than being stuck with that pain.
Things aren’t going to change on their own. So, make a firm decision to stop thinking about your past. Take conscious efforts to let go of everything, including material things, role models, beliefs, and judgments that remind you of the past.
They should also evolve with the changing times. Get the pain and frustration out of your system once and for all. It will not only help you let go of your past but also help you understand the precise role you played in it.
Most importantly, you must forgive yourself and those who have hurt you in the past. It isn’t a sign of weakness but the ability to raise yourself above others. Finally, yet importantly, focus on the present and the future as it will prevent your mind from thinking about the past.
2. Take Responsibility for Your Actions
Everyone makes mistakes, but a sensible person takes responsibility for his actions. Unless you have developed the ability to own your actions (and resulting consequences), earning self-respect and respect from your peers and friends is next to impossible.
Whether you have an unreasonable life partner or a demanding boss, you are always accountable for your response. In other words, taking responsibility for your actions is the first step towards creating the kind of life you want.
For example, instead of making petty excuses, saying “Sorry, I messed up. What can I do to make it up to you” can strengthen your professional and personal relationships in the long run. People will acknowledge your honesty and integrity.
Stop blaming others and start looking into yourself. Recognize your strengths and weaknesses. Try to turn your weaknesses and bad habits around. Once you have a complete picture of who you are, being responsible feels natural and fun.
3. Find Your Purpose
Most people feel stuck because they lack purpose. Purpose is something that makes you feel alive, it adds sparkle to your seemingly mundane life.
Is there anything at all that makes you feel alive? What makes you go that extra mile? What makes you lose track of time when you are doing it? Asking yourself these questions is a great way to explore your purpose.
If you think you have already fulfilled your purpose, you should start seeking a new one. After all, you must be passionate about something. It could be anything as simple as running a kitchen for the homeless or volunteering for a local animal shelter.
Finding your purpose essentially means taking the necessary steps to reach a state of happiness and satisfaction that goes well beyond material things.
4. Live Your Life as an Adventure
What comes to your mind when someone talks about living an adventurous life? Venturing into the wild like Bear Grylls armed with just a backpack? Taking up skydiving or mountain climbing?
Unfortunately, most people don’t have the resources and the guts to accomplish any of these things. But, the good news is that you don’t have to do something extreme to make your life exciting.
The simplest way to tickle your adventurous side is to try something new. For example, you can get a personal makeover such as a new haircut or try a new outfit. You can also learn a new skill or hobby such as playing a sport or a musical instrument. In short, it involves stepping out of your comfort zone for a while and exploring your wild side.
However, traveling is still the best way to live an adventure. You get to meet new people and explore unknown cultures. You may not be able to take that trip to the Bahamas right now, but you can start planning it nonetheless. In fact, planning a trip is as exciting as actually going on one.
5. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Comparison can be a valuable tool for evaluating your strengths and weaknesses. Unfortunately, most people end up comparing the strengths of others to their weaknesses. This kind of comparison can throw you into the vortex of self-doubt and depression.
The rise of social media has further exacerbated the situation, as people are getting unrestricted access to material upon which to compare themselves. Unfortunately, chronic comparison acts like a slow poison.
Stop comparing yourself to others, as it is perhaps the best way to mitigate this problem. However, you can use comparison to keep track of your growth as a person. Just make sure to avoid comparing yourself unfavorably to anyone. Whenever you compare yourself to others, stop and ask yourself if you are comparing your strength to theirs in a fair manner.
6. Listen to Your Favorite Track
The effects of music on the human mind are not yet fully understood. However, it is a well-known fact that your favorite music has a calming effect on your mind, while the music you dislike tends to have the exact opposite effect.
A scientific study published in Nature has confirmed that listening to the right music can potentially lift not just your mood, but also your creativity, productivity, and calmness. In other words, listening to your favorite music changes the response of your brain, dramatically.
So, put on your favorite track to get your mind off the negative thoughts. You can also think of undergoing music therapy if required.
Usually, this therapy focuses on improving your physical as well as mental well-being and developing cognitive and social skills through music. However, at least, try to listen to your favorite music at least for a few minutes, particularly when you are feeling low.
7. Embrace Uncertainty
From constant floods and earthquakes to the ever-changing economy, life is full of uncertainties. Uncertainty is a terrifying notion to most people because it embodies the possibilities of potential disasters and dangers. That’s why embracing the certainty rather than fearing it is a vital skill that you must develop.
To embrace uncertainty, you first need to realize that you cannot control every aspect of your life. For example, you may perform a given task with all your heart; still, your boss may decline to recognize your efforts.
Does that mean you shouldn’t work hard? No! But the feeling of having control over everything in your life is illusory at times. So, try to convince your inner self that uncertainty is perpetual. You can do your best and still expect things to go sideways.
The best way to experience uncertainty first hand is to go out there and try new things. Take the road less traveled. Do what makes you feel uncomfortable. Take calculated risks. When you step out of your comfort zone, you become intimately familiar with uncertainty.
8. Focus on What You Have
Most people fail to realize the potential of gratitude. Gratitude teaches you to focus on what you can do with what you have. It changes your perspective towards life.
For example, in this fragile economic scenario, maybe you are underpaid. However, you are still better off than people who are jobless. Thus, when you focus on what you have instead of what you don’t, you start looking at the bigger picture.
The first thing you need to do is to count your blessings every day before going to bed. Learn to appreciate what you have, including your loved ones. Always try to do the best you can with what you have.
Remember, all the successful people began their journey with a small step. After all, Bill Gates started Microsoft in a garage. Indulge in simple acts of kindness such as helping an old person cross the street or buying a fresh latte for your colleague.
9. Don’t Ignore Your Problems
Don’t ignore your problems because you can’t run forever. Eventually, you will have to face them. Don’t expect others to solve your problems either. Sure, your friends and loved ones can support you during tough times, but they can’t help you forever. Therefore, you need to step up and face your problems head-on.
In today’s overstressed environment, people often tend to ignore small problems until they become too big to be ignored. As a result, you spend more time and resources, trying to mitigate the damages caused by such problems. Instead, you need to deal with a problem before it gets out of hand, putting out the fire before it burns your house to ashes.
Get yourself organized. Make a list of all your daily tasks and plan your next day before going to bed. It will allow you to find time to deal with the smallest issues in your life. Keep track of all the tasks to make sure they are taken care of well in time.
10. Connect with Your Inner-Self
No! I am not asking you to meditate in a cave for years or to reach a state of nirvana. All you need to do is find some time to connect with your inner-self every day. Just talk to that inner critic and see how he is feeling today.
The truth is, your inner-self is communicating with you continually, even when you are asleep. But when you become consciously aware of this inner voice, you can channel its energy to increase your productivity and creativity.
Meditation, of course, is the most common way to find your inner-self and connect with it. However, spending some time in nature can also help you in this regard. Try to escape from the concrete jungle whenever possible. Take a hike in the nearby woods and explore your surroundings. Just disconnect from your city life for a while.
Indulging in your favorite hobby is also a great way to connect with your inner-self. Try to find some spare time for your hobby or passion. For example, Custom paint by numbers is a great way to relax and practice mindfulness. You can also practice mindfulness to become exceptionally aware of your inner-self as well as surroundings. Mindfulness is nothing but focusing your entire attention on the task at hand.
11. Never Stop Trying
You might be going through a hailstorm right now, but in due course of time, the sky will become clear. However, you should never stop trying. Life is not always fair. It will knock you down real hard sometimes, but you have to get back up and keep moving.
The moment you give in, your life will go into a continual state of stagnation. You will feel empty inside even if everything seems to be going well. You can take well-planned breaks to recharge yourself. However, whatever your purpose, whatever the obstacles, never stop trying. Remember, slow and steady wins the race.
Vicissitudes are an inescapable part of our lives. Sometimes, however, your spirit is so low that you spiral into a never-ending state of stagnancy.
You must not lose hope and perseverance during such difficult times. All you need to do is take the first step to bring back the momentum of your life. Hopefully, these 11 tips will help you overcome the feeling that you don’t want to live anymore.