What does a long-term relationship do to the spontaneity, intimacy and connection between two people?
Anyone who has been with a partner for a certain period of time can tell you that the initial passion subsides, people get more comfortable with each other and they become more settled in the relationship. These are all good things but they can lead to the loss of spontaneity.
When it comes to sex, it’s obvious that new couples have the most of it. People who have been together for a longer period of time and who self-characterize as happy claim that they have sex on the average once per week.
Our understanding of what’s normal in terms of frequency is heavily influenced by media. Still, if you’re dissatisfied and you’ve lost some of your happiness in the relationship, there are various things you can do about it.
Whether it comes to your sexual needs or something that you’re dissatisfied with, you have to communicate with your partner.
Don’t assume your partner is a mind reader. Waiting for them to guess what’s wrong will deprive you of numerous wonderful moments spent together.
You’re not happy in the bedroom? You’ve been together long enough to communicate your needs without being embarrassed. You’re unhappy about how your partner handled a certain situation? Let them know what would have been a better outcome.
A routine can easily be changed to make things fresh and exciting once again.
Take things out of the bedroom if you want a bit of adrenaline-fueled intimacy. Sex toys are also there for you to shake things up and feel like you’re experiencing your honeymoon all over again.
You don’t need to go for something unusual or very kinky. Small and classic types of sex toys are ideal for those who have no experience with such products. For example, here you can find a variety of bullet vibrators and these are amazing if you want to ensure ongoing clitoral stimulation during sex.
Sometimes, the routine will become so overwhelming that you’ll feel somewhat hesitant about doing new things.
The only way to ensure your happiness, however, involves action.
Don’t just think about everything you can do together – just go ahead and do it. Don’t dream of a spectacular trip you’re going to take together. Buy the tickets. Don’t imagine new sexual experiences and positions. Suggest those to the person you love.
As human beings, we’re capable of conceptualizing masterful schemes for life change. Unfortunately, we rarely follow through with the action required to make great things happen.
If you want a stable, happy and exciting long-term relationship, don’t let inertia take over. Active steps are required and they can yield amazing outcomes.
Happy couples know how to have productive arguments.
In other words, you should learn how to fight with each other in the best possible way.
Constructive arguments that will help you grow aren’t yelling showdowns. Rather, they involve open communication and feedback that the other person can utilize.
Don’t have an argument when you’re angry and emotional. Postpone the talk until you’ve managed to calm down. Listen to each other actively and if things get heated, take a break. Arguments are important to let off some steam and resolve issues but you have to know how to conduct them respectfully.
Appreciate your partner for who they are. Respect their boundaries, their strengths and weaknesses.
People who have been married for decades will tell you that you can’t change another human being.
Sure, you can evolve and become better together. Viewing your partner as an improvement project, however, is not going to work. You either accept and appreciate a person with all of their faults or you leave.
There are things you can do to help a person realize their full potential. This, however, is very different from attempting to initiate fundamental change.
You should also learn to appreciate every day and every moment spent together. Sooner or later, you could end up being regretful of previous scarce appreciative displays.
Things can be fresh and exciting, even if you’ve been with one and the same person over the course of numerous decades. In fact, this is when true magic can occur if both of you are willing to put a little bit of effort towards making amazing things happen.